Languish O heart!
languish heart languish!
let me see,
how long can you sear
how long you suffer
how much can you pine.
i shall not console
nor will utter a single word
to offer you respite.
even if you burst up
i shall not resort
to soothe your gushy wounds.
languish heart languish.
1985
Yearning
restless is my soul
restless..restless..
esurient is my psyche
esurient ..esurient...
thirst?
yes thirst remains and ever remains.
insatiable..unquenchable..
strife?
a lot..I go on and on
striving..striving..
Goal is anywhere mine?
never know never know.
for i possess an itinerant mind.
love do i trly have?
abounding abounding..
is the love my heart carries.
beau, do I have any?
yes i wish I had
but alas could not get.
so vast is the world
sundry are suitors..
but none is so deep
who could into the depths peep.
i adore an imaginary guy.
i yearned and pined
searing suffering embraced I
quaffed baneful tears
but my heart often sears
for a blissful hearty life!
4-9-1985
sojourn64
poetic expressions since childhood
Saturday 1 December 2012
My friend
deceipt,dereliction, derision
can daunt me ever not.
however mean you turn
i shall descend to meanness not.
you slave to cunnengness and
feign greatness friend.
i visualize myslef and
try to mend my ways.
you swot,suffer and toil
for you solely wish to spoil
my all efforts i humbly make.
my noble will you can not break.
you espoused envy and filth,
i embraced piety and love,
both of us have pined
you for envy and i for love.
1985
deceipt,dereliction, derision
can daunt me ever not.
however mean you turn
i shall descend to meanness not.
you slave to cunnengness and
feign greatness friend.
i visualize myslef and
try to mend my ways.
you swot,suffer and toil
for you solely wish to spoil
my all efforts i humbly make.
my noble will you can not break.
you espoused envy and filth,
i embraced piety and love,
both of us have pined
you for envy and i for love.
1985
True Allies
Once in my life
darkness gathered and
kith and kin went out
to misspell,mistrust me.
at first it seemed to me
all had if vanished.
love,faith, familiarity,
i found myself alone
deserted and deceived.
perpetrators of duplicity
wore a look away attitude.
leaving me to conclude-
truth faith go all in vain.
they only bring unbearable pain.
bitterness prevailed and life
turned into a searing weight.
friends derided me and
a few evnen chose to betray me.
day in day out,i thought and thought
and thought.
with eyes brimming with tears
i dwelt in ruts for long.
often asking myself-
what sustained me during
such traumatic times?
the query was answered
from a still chore of heart.
it were they who nursed me
hope,dream and a desire to be.
1985
Once in my life
darkness gathered and
kith and kin went out
to misspell,mistrust me.
at first it seemed to me
all had if vanished.
love,faith, familiarity,
i found myself alone
deserted and deceived.
perpetrators of duplicity
wore a look away attitude.
leaving me to conclude-
truth faith go all in vain.
they only bring unbearable pain.
bitterness prevailed and life
turned into a searing weight.
friends derided me and
a few evnen chose to betray me.
day in day out,i thought and thought
and thought.
with eyes brimming with tears
i dwelt in ruts for long.
often asking myself-
what sustained me during
such traumatic times?
the query was answered
from a still chore of heart.
it were they who nursed me
hope,dream and a desire to be.
1985
Melancholy
My poor heart!
how chimerical are you!
in the abyss of dismal darkness,
you in vain hanker
for a beam of soothing light.
scuffling hard through,
the ocean of melancholy.
you stare drearily
at the distant shore
progging for someone's
genuine love and
unflinching faithfulness.
have you learnt nothing?
from the past and
surrounders by?
or you feebly want
to going on thriving
on throes of people's
turpitude!
1984
Catharsis
cruelty is engrossing me
as undue tolerance has
poisoned my life always.
ironically i can't avenge
who take me for a ride
during tough strife.
sincerity,gentility
stubborneness
are my unmixed weaknesses.
to meanness but i do not
subscribe.my anguish
only poems can describe,
simple prosaic words,
soak up my tears,
feeling of revenge then
in thin air disappears.
Life
why did i not,
like many others
commit suicide?
i quaffed apoisoned life.
but refused always
to abondon the stife.
deaths did i get many,
by my firm mind
assured me always
that death can never cure
disease we all call life.
My fate
O, the fate!
give me troubles, i welcome you.
give me poison to kill
my captivating wishes.
and give me brew
to nurse up the soul.
so the soul might grow bold.
and to plant it more strong
you bring thorns a few more!
1980
Loneliness
MY GOD!
while before you do i come,
i wish to forget all.
the noisy world,
the joys and woes.
Pray,love me ever God!
desertion,humiliation
and indignant words
are the gifts of worldy lovers.
just thorns to run deep
into the solemn soul.
why shed tears?
why should i pine?
for the gone, healed wounds.
Let me find asylum here
before your dear God!.
let the life, the death,
the smiles and the pains
the dreams and the deeds
all be for you.
for nomore can i bear
this loneliness
My God!
31.3.1984
Determination
I did
I do
and I shall
pave my way
myself.
with bricks of experiences
concrete of criticism
and cement of nagging
mixed with carping
coming to me.
I shall mix up
the sap of praise
given to me.
thus will make
my own way.
I have been paving
I do pave and
I shall pave
my own way.
until falls
the aim of life
i will pave
and i will pave.
1983
Advice
Be not truthful to this world
but only to yourself.
delude yourself no more
deceive yourself no more.
for only to this world belong
dream not of heavenly joys
express your wounds not
express your woes no more.
for even a altruist man
is embodiment of sheer selfishness.
1983
i refuse to share with this world.
pretty pretty woes of mine.
i have been fighting all alone
i will suffer and may i pine.
the arena of life is beset with ironies
bushes,briars and acute spines.
I refuse to lie, I refuse to feign
I refuse to wane my natural shine.
1983
I did
I do
and I shall
pave my way
myself.
with bricks of experiences
concrete of criticism
and cement of nagging
mixed with carping
coming to me.
I shall mix up
the sap of praise
given to me.
thus will make
my own way.
I have been paving
I do pave and
I shall pave
my own way.
until falls
the aim of life
i will pave
and i will pave.
1983
Advice
Be not truthful to this world
but only to yourself.
delude yourself no more
deceive yourself no more.
for only to this world belong
dream not of heavenly joys
express your wounds not
express your woes no more.
for even a altruist man
is embodiment of sheer selfishness.
1983
i refuse to share with this world.
pretty pretty woes of mine.
i have been fighting all alone
i will suffer and may i pine.
the arena of life is beset with ironies
bushes,briars and acute spines.
I refuse to lie, I refuse to feign
I refuse to wane my natural shine.
1983
The Elegy
Not more then an elegy
is my wretched life..
with death knell
I came in this world
to begin the funeral of life.
So sad, tragedic,
the path to graveyard is lost.
squandering to and fro
the elegy is going on..
the elegy shall be going on..
untill the graveyard falls.
the graveyard of my death
is whether near or far
i know not.
but the elegy gets no end
this only can i show!
1982
The solitude
O! the solitude!
the sweetest friend
my dearest lover!
who can be better then you?
nearer and nearest
accompanying me ever
giving respite,rest.
let me forget all
the joys,the woes,
the noisy world.
fuck me as a whole!
please love me evermore!
who knows me better then you?
who needs me as much as you?
My solitude! solitude!
your silent quiesent love
the pious carress and loving touch
is the only longing of mine.
what else in this deceptive world
i can say is mine?
nothign else but only you.
it is you my solitude
most loving friend,
O! solitude!
1982
Not more then an elegy
is my wretched life..
with death knell
I came in this world
to begin the funeral of life.
So sad, tragedic,
the path to graveyard is lost.
squandering to and fro
the elegy is going on..
the elegy shall be going on..
untill the graveyard falls.
the graveyard of my death
is whether near or far
i know not.
but the elegy gets no end
this only can i show!
1982
The solitude
O! the solitude!
the sweetest friend
my dearest lover!
who can be better then you?
nearer and nearest
accompanying me ever
giving respite,rest.
let me forget all
the joys,the woes,
the noisy world.
fuck me as a whole!
please love me evermore!
who knows me better then you?
who needs me as much as you?
My solitude! solitude!
your silent quiesent love
the pious carress and loving touch
is the only longing of mine.
what else in this deceptive world
i can say is mine?
nothign else but only you.
it is you my solitude
most loving friend,
O! solitude!
1982
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